There are so many things that could go wrong in our everyday lives. For personal needs, wants, and gains as individuals, we have choices, we have options, we have decisions to make on how to live our daily lives. We have to power to change the course of our day. Me, myself, and I, right?

As self-empowered individuals, we forget that when it comes to making decisions that will affect the rest of our days or lives, no decision should be easy. So regardless of the consequences, we don't think rationally and give in to impulse. Why? Because it's easier. Therein lies the problem as in the process, we can create bigger problems that will affect not just ourselves but others.

People tell me I tend to overthink and I admit to doing that sometimes. Who doesn't? The simple truth is; I am very careful. Even as the VP/COO of the company, I know that it cannot always be "my way or the highway".

“Whether I empower myself because of my position or consider "Who does it best" and enable others instead is dependent on the situation.”

There are some however that I will not sacrifice in the name of "teamwork" or social acceptance so I always take it one issue at a time, one decision at a time, one day at a time.

In between the powers you have to take action, to choose or make small or big decisions every day is your clever ability to use whatever authority you have to your advantage. Being powerful is not having all the powers we can exercise but having the control of these powers as an individual to change the course of our day or life. It’s in your control whether you end being the best you or the worse you.

I am always asked questions like, "How did you do it?", "What advice can you give me?" or "How can I be like you?". It’s simple. I chose to be the best ME! With the proper mindset, I took control! One step at a time, I set out to use self-empowerment to my advantage and very slowly but surely worked towards being the best me.

To the Virtual Assistants I work with, here are the simple everyday steps I took to start my journey.


Some people wake up and make up ready excuses for the possibilities of the day turning sideways. It's a defense mechanism. They would rather ignore issues than facing them head-on. This is setting themselves up for possible failures and being fine with it. This is NOT an option. When I wake up, I always think about work. I can't help it. First thought, last thought? WORK! There's that and the mantra I recite, "It's never an OFF day unless I make it so!" Yes, I empower myself to make it a great day. This helps me keep that positive vibe and the ready to dive in attitude burning all through the day.


Before the day starts, I remind myself that my only option is to be strong. I won't know how strong I am or can be if I don't live my life convinced that my only option is to be strong. I choose to face my fears, push myself, channel that strength to reach my full potential. Backing down from daily challenges because I have it in my mind that I have the option of backing down is not a choice.


When we talk habits, what comes to mind? It's either good or bad. All through my professional career, from the corporate to now working virtually, I’ve always called them acceptable or unacceptable habits. Acceptable or unacceptable to whom? Well! To me, of course! I know myself so I am aware of what practices are acceptable to me in relation to what I do and the people affected by what I do every day.

Examples of some habits I am empowering myself to practice every day, no questions asked.

  • Making it a habit to note everything as depending on how busy my day is, I tend to forget things.
  • Making it a habit to resolve and not make up excuses for myself or others if something goes wrong.
  • Making it a habit not to get scared easily when faced with something new I'm required to accomplish.
  • Making it a habit to not think twice and just do because I sometimes find myself procrastinating


As an individual who has the power to decide for myself which way to go, I know I can't control everything around me. There are always consequences and people affected by my actions. I take control with the knowledge that as long as I take action with the purest of motives and only with the best intentions, everything will fall into place.


Sometimes I get stuck. It’s not that I don't know what to do because using not knowing how to do things as an excuse to not do things is not an option. I can always find and learn the best ways to complete.

When do I get stuck or wouldn't know how to proceed exactly? It's when I don't know what I really want. I will think carefully about what I want from my task, my project, my day, from me personally, and from people in general. Once I have those down, I won't stop to think if I should take action to get what I want. I just immediately do because, why not already? If I want it enough, I choose to get so I do!


At the end of the day, it's not only what I know but what I choose to do. I will make myself accountable for results and consequences. Base on everything I am dealt with that day and in that situation, I create a plan and be smart about it. I will be careful and not make rash decisions during execution.


I tell myself that if I can get so little of someone, I take what I can get and I will work on getting more from myself instead. Being dependent on people for what we need to accomplish is the best way to waste time and I don’t like wasting time. The only choice for me is to be the person people can depend on instead of the person who depends on others.


I mentioned in one of my blogs that change is the only constant. It's always there. Small or big changes, they're there if we look and observe closely. This is when I can create even the smallest opportunities for myself that day. I prepare myself every single day for changes that may come up so I can easily adapt.


I will only stop learning when all lessons are learned. What’s lesson #1? There is no such thing as "all lessons learned". Every single day, there is always a lesson to be learned, loopholes to find, opportunities to be had, leverage to gain. It doesn't stop! I don't stop. Not stopping is the only option.


Regrets! We are familiar with the word because no matter how careful we are if we're not in total control, we have the tendency to give in to impulse. Having regrets means you didn't give this day your all, you were not your best self, you didn't use your powers to your advantage. As a result, you wasted precious time, and regretting is just adding to time already wasted. Enough already!

The best you that day should to be able to say with confidence, "After carefully considering everything I had to work with, I am confident that the actions taken today were the best and if given the chance to turn back time, I would still go the same route".

See? Would've! Could've! Should've! Well, people! It is what it is! There is no going back and there is no room for regrets! There is only learning from it and moving on. You are who you are today because of the "YOU" you chose to be yesterday and how you got the be was entirely your choice!

You don't like the "YOU" you woke up to this morning? It's time to have a real conversation with yourself regarding how you use your powers when it comes to your daily and life decisions, the options you give yourself, the choices you make at any given time

I leave you with this:

"Know that you could've been if you wanted! Know that you could if you want because it's never too late if you want it enough. It just takes commitment and the passion in YOU to BE."

About the author:
Bernadette Canero holds a Bachelor's degree in Industrial Engineering. She is one of the founders and owners of Summit VA Solutions. Ms Canero is Summit VA Solutions' Vice President and Chief Operating Officer and Virtual Assistant Trainer.

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